The Why Behind Everything I Do
As I sit here looking over my planner for the next few weeks, trying to organize my life and create a sense of normalcy among the chaos that is my current life, I have to pause, breathe, and be thankful for what has brought me to the chaos that I have today. When you’re sitting in the delivery room, waiting for them to hand you your very first, teensy weensy, wrinkly, freshly bathed and swaddled little peanut, what they don’t tell you is that not only is this little person now outside your body but now, so is your heart. Here you are, Mrs. Roberts, and you will now be wearing your heart outside your body for the rest of your life. Then add another little peanut. Then another. All girls. Three beautiful girls. Each one about two and a half to three years younger than the next. And all three not just taking a piece of my heart but doubling and tripling the size of it and each one carrying their very own portion with them forever.
I always knew I would be a mommy but never really knew how consuming of a job it would be. I never knew that I would be up all hours of the night, watching a toddler’s rapid breathing while she fights off a fever, that I would look into the eyes of a 6 year old and see a smart, independent, growing girl and long for the days when I could hold her in that crevice in my elbow again, that I would get so excited for pee- it the potty chair and not on the floor, and to never underestimate the power of a Dora band-aid and a handful of marshmallows. Being a mommy is by far the greatest job I’ve ever been given, the best title anyone could bestow on me and a messy, fierce, tumultuous career of raw emotion and trial and error where you can’t resign, aren’t promoted and never get a bathroom break!
These three little ladies (and my handsome husband) are the peanut butter to my jelly, the air I breathe, and the “why” behind everything I do. They’re the reason why I’m going back to school to finish my nursing degree. They’re the reason why I’m up late every night working from home as a health and fitness coach to give them a life I can only dream about. They’re the reason why I eat healthy, follow a (semi) disciplined workout plan and keep my health at the forefront of my life so I can set an example for them of what it means to be healthy and fit. I want them to know the importance of having a positive self image and above all want to be there for them as long as The Good Lord allows me to be. As I continue to grow my business from home, meet more people, help more people reach their goals, and meet my own goals in the process, I see them watching me. Watching me cautiously to see what my next move is. Imitating my workouts when they think I’m not looking and laughing hysterically when I catch them. We’ve been laughing a lot lately. Maybe it’s because I am so happy to be home with them, loving on them, teaching them and learning from them at the same time, and giving them hope that when you set your sights to something, no matter how weak or strong, fierce or fearful, girly or tomboyish, you can accomplish great things!